for the first time awhile
the world feels semi-still
i spent the am listening to records
cleaning like my life depended on it

candles burn
i light the special one adorned with acorns
that david gave me
and i contemplate the new album
seeing how the songs feel

there is an album
that my life has centered around
the first album i ever heard
it seems to have set the tone
the prodigal…according to reba

i have lived my life
wanting to sing the title song
but knew that i couldn’t
i hadn’t lived it yet

the past (almost) two years
have been that experience
i realized that today
as i sat here, listening
and knowing in my core how the story felt

three months into my time in new york
something pushed me to go back home
instead i went to california
and then back to new york
i knew there was a work to do

i have never felt a connection with a city
the way that i do with nashville
my guts are there; my bones ache for it
i long for it
most days i feel completely lost

i hear judy gossett croon
get yourself on home where you belongand after 33 years
i know she’s singing to me
i gotta get home to my city

i miss old hickory road in franklin
lake radner and my walks there
the roads that contain my memories
and the people who are my song

i came to new york to escape
and to chase a dream i thought was mine
it wasn’t mine
it was everyone else’s dream for me
and it’s almost killed me

i am an artist
not a star
nor do i ever want to be one
i love my craft
i do not like the business

i have been incredibly blessed
i’ve met almost all of my heroes
i’ve worked with people with monumental talent
and that isn’t over
i will always create

but i have accepted my own rhythm
my own pace, my own way
i have let go of others projections
and any desire to fulfill them
i am me, period